Wednesday, November 14, 2007

More Travel!

The moment we met, we became instant best friends in college. Sometimes you just met those people who the moment you met - you know you are going to be instant, great friends. That's how it was with R. R and I are such similar people it amazes me sometimes. We fret over the same things, act silly in the same ways, and have taken similar paths in life. Our personalities vary and we react differently to some things, but majority of the time, we see eye to eye.

About 6 months ago we planned to attend GWU Homecoming - back to our old university to relive a few great memories and a great excuse to get together. Life has gotten in our way and though we talk often, we haven't seen each other nearly as much as we would like. I flew down to Charlotte on Oct 26, early in the AM, and R picked me up with her little boy. He is the spitting image of her! I got to see her new house in SC, visit with her and her hubby too. We cooked together, played games, talked, gossiped, chatted (this consumed a lot of time ha), etc. The next day we went shopping at our old stomping grounds of gaffney, had a japanese dinner in shelby, and attended the homecoming game in Boiling Springs.

The weekend went way too fast... i couldn't be more grateful for our time together that weekend. for the years of friendship thus far. for the ease of our friendship. thats right - its just easy. We talk, we're honest with each other, we know when to say one of us is being stupid, unfair, or completely unrealistic. we also know when to just listen - thats most important. I can call her when i'm utterly happy! and when i'm unbelievable sad. Again, how great are old friends? Nothing beats them!


One of the best feelings, the older I get especially, is getting together with old friends. Husband and I have so many friends of all ages and geographically spread apart, but nothing beats the old comfort of friends who have known you longer than most and who you have a bond with unlike most others. Oct 12-14, we went to Washington DC for a weekend jaunt to meet up with Erin and Matt. Erin is one of my old BF's from college. Not just a BF but a roomie and one of my favorite people. After college, we somehow lost touch for a period of time but now, having reconnected, we haven't missed a beat since. Then being together, I was once again reminded of why we became such good friends in the first place. We just mesh well:-)

The trip was great. Stayed in a nice hotel, ate great food, talked and talked some more, toured the sights, did lots of walking, took pictures, and didn't have to get up too horribly early, even though Matt was probably pacing the floors waiting on the rest of us sleepyheads lol. He's the only morning person of the crew. The weekend went way too fast and the Sunday goodbye's came way too soon. We left with promises of making it a yearly tradition, one I feel we will definitely keep! Can't wait to do it again. Until then, we call, leave many long winded voicemails, write lengthy emails, and eventually catch one another sometimes and have a real phone conversation.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007


We rarely have visitors. Not because we don't want them (well most of the time thats not the reason). But because we live where we do - Philadelphia, PA. Most of my family is down south. Husband's family is all in Pittsburgh which is not far but they still don't travel the 5 hour treck often. His folks come once a year. Mine come once a year as well. We love the visits from the parents and hate to see them go. Another reason we don't have visitors often is again - because of where we live. Most of our friends are on average an hour away (philly's a big place) so we end up meeting halfway for lunch, dinner, or drinks. It works and then I don't have to scrub my house silly clean!

My parents came for their yearly visit Oct 5-9. We went shopping, toured Longwood Gardens, ate good food, saw the movie "Into the Wild", and did lots of chatting. That's what me and mom do - chat, talk, visit, and then do it some more. Longwood Garden's are truly beautiful, even in the fall. I was amazed by their organic vegetable gardens! That tour was right up my gardner parents alley.

The movie "Into the Wild" was just what I expected and more. Not only is a great film that I classify as a must see, but the message of the film is powerful. The movie tells the story of Christopher McCandless, a wandering soul who is searching for a greater life. He feels that life is waiting for him in the Alaskan wilderness. This true life story is an amazing and eventful one. I left there reminding myself that material things really hold little to no actual worth. Our happiness stems from our relationships and from love. I vow to be less materialistic. to value my relationships more. invest more time with others. love with my whole heart. stop spending money on pointless things. Again, the film is a must see.

We had dinner one night at Bonefish Grill in Exton, PA. Excellent food there as usual. I ordered one of the specials but regretted not ordering what husband did - the pistachio encrusted trout. That is my favorite dish there and the times I haven't ordered it, I've regretted it! I vow to stop trying new things there and stick with my love - the pistachio encrusted trout.

Parents departed Tuesday morning after I left for work. The treck back to TN is I-81 most of the way... horrible highway and too many trucks. But they had safe travels...


We've been busy traveling recently and I haven't had time to write. But I'm glad. We love traveling and doing new activities, seeing new areas, and meeting up with old friends.

Sept 21 we went to Connecticut for a long weekend of sight seeing and kayaking. Traffic in NYC was the norm for a friday night - total nightmare. We swore to one another, asking why we didn't go another way. Unfortunately, being stuck on the bridge, we had no option but to stick it out. Thankfully we made it to our dinner destination in Branford, CT. Dinner at Lenny's was amazing! Its a seafood joint down a couple small roads. It's not fancy or expensive and the food is great - so just our style! I had the Broth version of clam chowder and Husband had his usual New England clam chowder. Both were good but Husband's was great. I wish I could have ordered a cup of that but knew if I did, I wouldn't finish my dinner. Husband went with the fish and chips which he said were very good. We both agreed though - I outordered him! I had the Maryland crab cakes which were awesome. The perfect amounts of crab meat with breadcrumbs and perfectly matched spices. I LOVED my food.

We left there and drove up to Windsor, CT, just north of Hartford to stay overnight. Saturday morning we got going fairly early to do sightseeing of little villages and hit up some good new england tag sales. We scored a few good deals but mostly enjoyed seeing all the historic homes. Kayaking was great - so peaceful yet a good upper body workout too! We want to do this more often. The trip home was filled with CT backroads to get a real feel for the state. We loved what we saw and wish for our own center chimney home one day. Its always great to return home to Sammy and Nelly, our little pups. Well they're full grown but still our little ones we saw. Our kids. The four of us make up our family. Our happy little family...

Sunday, September 16, 2007


We watched the movie "Thank you for Smoking" on Friday night. I heard about the movie briefly way back when, then Friday it entered my brain somehow and I was dying to rent it. Its a very interesting movie - I definitely recommend it because its not your average drama, chic flick, or comedy. Its satire maybe? Whatever category - its interesting. The main character is a Lobbyist for the Tobacco Association, Vice President of the organization actually. He is their mouthpiece, defending tobacco products to politicians in DC, the general American public, and anyone else who'll listen, all while death rates from lung cancer continue to escalate. Interesting Fact - not one cigarette is smoked in the entire movie! You root for this guy throughout the entire flick.

The son questions the dad (main character) asking him "how do you do what you do dad?". His response is "I have a moral flexibility most other people don't have." I have morals. I have flexibility. Do the two mix? That's something I'm not sure about but this line in the movie stuck with me. It draws me to the point of being "open minded" and meaning it. Lots of people say they are open minded but - are they? Are they really? Or does it just sound good? I vow to continue being an open minded individual. Once our ideas and opinions are set in stone, to never change again - we don't open ourselves up for learning something new, seriously considering a varying point of view, or comprehending the other side. Another line in the movie says something like "I just don't take anything that seriously. Its not worth it." When I feel myself taking life too seriously - I'm going to recite that line to myself. In my life - I'm seeking happiness. Complete utter happiness. If I get caught up in the morals of others or take life too seriously, aren't I missing the point?

FYI - Last night, J called Husband. K, as it turns out, IS a steeler fanatic. yippee.

Saturday, September 15, 2007


I'm a doubter. Don't misunderstand. I'm an overall positive person who is confident, self motivated, and always planning for the future. Yet, somehow, someway, I often manage to doubt myself! I should order the salad with goat cheese and pecans. Place order. Dammit, I should have gone with the feta and walnut one! I don't doubt every decision, but many. My restaurant order. My job. Where to live. If we should have kids.

To have a baby. Or not. Do we or don't we? Pro's and Con's lists are composed in my head, perks and pitfalls put down on paper. One day my pro's outweight the con's but the next day, its reversed. How do I ever make a decision on this? It's been heavy on my mind for a variety of reasons.

Several years ago I had a molar pregnancy - I won't bore you with the definition of this but basically your body thinks your pregnant yet you never were. Ultimately, I was relieved when that was diagnosed. Husband nor I were either ready for a child, especially me. I've never been the woman who yearns to be a mom, care for a baby, console them when they cry, watch them grow up, etc. Some girls just know they want to be a mom. I was not 'that girl'. My BFF, R, has such a strong motherly instinct - "I'll be a teacher, get married, have kids" she would say. I was the girl who would say "Ehh, I'm not sure I even want kids", especially if I was out hearing babies cry and toddlers whine.

FYI - I have overcome a lot of this child anxiety. Give me a break, I was never really around kids growing up. I was the youngest in my family and just wasn't thrown into babyland at any point in time. It's not like I was a kid hater. I just wasn't 'kid friendly'. I've moved past a lot of that, maybe because of my age. Also, my instinct to have a child of my own has miraculously kicked in I think. This scares me.

Previously, I would see a pregnant woman and think - Poor lady. Doesn't know what she's in for! On top of trying to manage a crazy kid who will grow up to be a teenager, putting the parents through hell, she's destined to be fat the rest of her life! Who WANTS that sort of thing? 'Nuts' I say to self. Then one day, out of nowhere, it hit me. Bam. I see cute pregnant woman, all belly, and my mind says 'Awwee. She is adorable! What a neat experience. To actually having a living human being inside your body. Must be amazing!' "What are you thinking?!!" I reprimand self. Have you lost your bloody mind! You don't WANT that. You don't want to be fat the rest of your life, never able to loose that baby belly of pudge. You don't WANT to be the mom at the store whose kid is running around screaming, throwing themself on the floor, because you won't buy them that hershey bar, with lots of onlookers thinking, gees that kid is a brat! You don't WANT to have a hellish teenager who tortures you with their bad decisions, ignoring all of the morals and values you tried to instill in them. You don't WANT to give up all your freedoms in life. Racking my brain to answer my psychotic thoughts, it crept up on me. 'Well, our kid would be different'. What? I need a drink. This is not ME.

The process continues. I talk to husband. He is the king of 'our kid would be different', 'we would teach them proper behavior', 'its all in the parenting', 'we would be great parents'. Sigh. He's right. As weeks move into months, I find myself looking at babies and children out with their parents and thinking 'awwwee, he's so cute' and 'oh look, she has the most adorable curls!'. Then wanting to slap myself back into reality. Doesn't work.

Moving on. Husband is great with kids, loves them, and knows that he wants them. He's not particularly concerned with the timing. I analyze timeframes. When we should do what where is what I analyze. Husband is a laid back go with the flow man. Good thing - I need that balance.

Within this year, I've been having issues with ovarian cysts, missed periods, and lots of pelvic pain. Thus far, the obgyn tells me its not a huge concern but she can't rule out that it could lead to infertility problems. Infertility. Problems. Words like PCOS and Endometriosis. Huh? No. Not me. Is has been my choice to not have a child. My choice. After being married for 6 1/2 years, Don't tell me I can't. Have I waited myself out? I'm only 27 for the love of God. Obgyn's advice - either get on birth control or start trying to conceive. That's the only way to prevent the cysts. Reality check.

Therefore with my recent attraction to the possibility (keyword - possibility) of having a child, we have THE talk. On the way home from a Labor day trip to visit In-Laws, I corner husband into a serious chat. Wives, FYI, roadtrips are the BEST time for a serious chat with Husbands. They have zero distractions (well, besides other drivers and the radio, so I should say few distractions) so there is no other choice but to actually focus on the conversation and they can't get out of it. Where are they going to go? The backseat? Husband was quick to agree to start trying. We analyze, discuss. Final decision: We'll start trying. I analyze planning and timing. If I get pregnant in Sept, I might miss J's wedding (old friend). And if I get pregnant in Nov, we might miss J and C's wedding (cousin). I love wedding season. Hmm. Maybe Oct? But then it could come early, still knocking me out of J's wedding. Would I be a fat cow err I mean pregnant for a wedding? Ugh. That would kill me. Husband reminds me, it takes months to get pregnant. We'll just start and when it happens, it happens. Okay, I say. Agreed.

My fears: financial fears. protection fears. Daycare is damn expensive. How can we afford it? Money is short now as it is. Then to thrown a grand a month into daycare - hell, we could afford a second house payment for that price. Protection fear - and I think the reason I was so hesistant about kids from the get go - you can't protect your children. You can try. You can bust your ass to ensure their safety. You can do a background check on every person they might encounter. You can teach them don't talk to strangers. You can teach them to tell mommy and daddy is someone ever tries to hurt them. But you can't always be their protection. Ultimately, this is what scares me.

Moving on. We aren't trying. We are just seeing what happens so to speak. No protection. But not having sex every other day and checking my temperature. Just doing it and enjoying it. I've been overanalyzing my body. Was that a cramp? Do I feel nauseas? No, no. Its nothing. Wait, that was a cramp! Months of this would literally make me bonkers. Then back to my opening line of being a self doubter. Thursday night while in class (and needing to focus on Accounting!) my mind wanders to 'we cannot afford to have kids. Holy shit we will be SO broke! This is not a good time. Husband is still working on his bachelors. I am working on my masters. We neither one have an incredible paying job. Oh gees, I hope I'm not pregnant!' Today, Saturday, I'm back to the other side. 'We would manage. Everything would work itself out. No one is ever really ready! And the joy a baby would bring us would make it all worth it'.

Somehow, I've managed to convince myself (on most days!) that our child will be an angel, I'll loose all my baby weight plus a few pounds extra, and feel fabulous after childbirth! The financial and protection fears persist - this is where my doubting comes in. No way to know yet whether its already happened. Every other time I've taken a pregnancy test, I have been in complete fear of those two lines that mean pregnant! Now, I'm wanting the two lines? Am I? See - still doubting!!

Friday, September 14, 2007


"You should call Jay and Kara to see if they want to get together and watch the Steelers game some Sunday, ya know?" I have to throw in "ya know" on the end of many sentence to remind Husband that this requires a response. Often it seems that unless its posed as a question, he sees no reason for a verbal response. I, Wife, find this irritating and now finding myself adding "ya know" onto lots of my statements... ya know? lol.

"Oh yea, I should. It would be fun to watch the game with them cause I know they're big Steelers fans", Husband says.

"How do you know?"

"I grew up with Jay, I'm sure he is - how couldn't he be? He's from western PA. Kara? I'm sure she is too. She grew up right outside Pittsburgh."

"That doesn't mean she's into football though. She might root for the Steelers but, doesn't mean she's a steeler fanatic."

I'm sure she's a Steeler fan hon."

Dammit. I had hoped to have someone to talk with, at least a little bit, while we watch the Steelers games. I like football, don't get me wrong. But I also love conversation. Why do both at the same time? Makes sense to me. Anyway, Husband doesn't really know Kara so I'm hoping he's wrong and she isn't a fanatic over the Steelers. I'll know I'm wrong if we show up at the bar to meet them and she has her face painted black and gold, with a Ben Roethlisberger jersey on, and streamers tied in her hair. Yep, then I'll know.

Days later, I ask, "Oh hey, did you call Jay to see about the game?"

"Oh no, not yet. I will though."

We have this conversation at least two more times whereupon I decide to stop asking.

As Wife, I am the coordinator of our social life. I can't help but wish this weren't so at times. Why can't Husband coordinate a social gathering or two or twelve? Its odd because he loves to get together with friends, his and mine, have drinks, eat dinner, etc. Yet he never initiates this cause he's cool if it doesn't happen. Wife on the other hand, not so much. I need social gatherings, contact with friends on a daily basis, friends I can gab to, share stories with! These things don't matter to Husband. I sometimes wish I could be that way, so independently okay, not needing friends and social events on an ongoing basis. But hey, I'm SO done with trying to change myself. I accept and love myself (yes, a line I learned in counseling! lol).

Husband has not bothered to keep in touch with old friends, high school, college, cousins, or any others. If he runs into them or hears from them, its all this "hey man, great to see ya. how's it going" stuff, like they didn't miss a beat. I say, "don't you miss your old friends?" "Yeah, I do!" Um, okay? I don't get it. On the other hand, I though, have dedicated myself to keeping important friendships intact because I not only need them but enjoy them and couldn't imagine my life without them.

We all have different sets of friends. When you're in high school, you have a "crowd" that you hang with, creating first real friendship memories. These are the friends who you grouped with cause you had a hell of a good time together. Not because you necessarily bonded with each other maybe but - It was all about fun! My high school friend Brooke is my bud. I get together with her when I go home, we ponder on stories about before we had our license, lost our virginity, or got married. Same with high school friend, Steph. She's like my little sis and I'm protective of her.

Then, you move on to college and a mass of strangers. You have more choices and end up with people whom you have a real connection with, forming bonds and everlasting friendships. You chose these friends because they fit you. Robin, my BFF, I met in college and she's just like a sister. I love her and rely on her more than I can say. Something would be missing from my life without her friendship and love. I know that feeling is mutual too. I can also call up my friends Erin, Deana, or Amanda from college, though we've maybe not talked in a month or two, and we pick up where we last left off. I relish in these friendships - these are 'my girls'.

But then - we "grow up", get jobs, and move to cities where we are a stranger among many strangers, in a place where you aren't throw into the masses with folks in the same boat as you. Its not high school or college. Its your job. Its your neighborhood. You become friends with people who maybe you may never would befriended otherwise and/or some who you really connect with. You work with them for god's sake, spending 40 hours a week with them. How can you not become friends? They live down the street from you, so why not? You get to know them out of convenience. And your friendship group continues to expand... I have friends all over the states... 

So sets of friends develop. You have old friends (high school), college friends, neighborhood friends, work friends, church friends. You rely on these different groups of friends for different purposes. Some of them will last a lifetime and others will fade away along the circumstance that brought you together.

Husband and I got together last weekend with Michelle and Todd for lunch at Mad Mex (great cheap mex food in university city area of philadelphia btw!). Michelle is in my group of "work friends" but someone I would have been friends with no matter who, what, when. We email daily, share TMI with each other, and bullshit over silly stuff. Lunch was a great time, good conversation. Everyone always departs saying we should do it more often. Then get in our cars asking our spouses, why don't we hang out with them more often. My work friend Carolyn came over last weekend for wine and food on our deck. Great time. 'Why don't we do this monthly' I say. I'm planning a trip to DC (i'm social coordinator, remember) with Erin and Matt, Erin being a college friend. We've had to postpone this 3 times because we can't get our two sets of schedules to match with their two sets. We now say October! October we'll definitely do this. Yes, agreed.

Life and obligations kick in and we sometimes move these friendships to the back burner, attending to the necessities... then when we do see one another, we realize this is a necessity too! This is something as adults, we need. I vow to continue to carve out that much needed time with my friends... it validates who I am, cheers me on when life is great, and reminds me i'm not the only one that struggles when life throws things in my face.

Husband still hasn't called Jay and Kara. I know this, not because I asked, but because I am Wife:) Should I call them? But I barely know them! They are "his" friends... Come to think of it, I don't even know their phone numbers. Okay, I'm letting this go (another counseling line - love them! lol).

Saturday, September 1, 2007


Anyone needing a good haircut in Waynesburg, PA should go to Holiday Hair and ask for Laura. Got my hair cut and layered there today by this girl and she's awesome - did exactly what i asked for and I'm loving my new style:-) She also did mom-in-law's hair, cut and color, last week and she loved hers as well. Laura comes highly recommended! I think i'll just wait till we come over here for in-law visits to get my hair done... there's nothing like having someone you trust to do you hair!


Love to travel... we do road trips, take a yearly vacation, and hit the highway many times a year to visit our spread out families. Our lastest journey - over to Waynesburg, PA to visit the in-laws for the labor day weekend. Thursday night, we didn't leave Downingtown until 10pm! Arrived in Waynesburg at 2:45AM and hit the sack. Both of us exhausted - husband from not feeling well, me from waking at 4:45am and taking a final that evening.

Friday I got up early to chat with Mom-in-law. I'm a lucky girl - I have the best mom-in-law. Just love her. We chat, catch up, share stories, even a little gossip, while watching 'Regis and Kelly' and drinking too much coffee. Beautiful weather here this weekend... just perfect. Always feels nice to get away from the hustle and bustle of Philadelphia for a few days... a vacation of sort.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007


Monday, my lunch got pushed so far back in the work fridge, that by noon it was half frozen. I had to sit out in the sun staring at my delicious quinoa feta salad, till it thawed. No big deal... things happen I tell myself. No big deal...

Tuesday, I took another salad. At noon, I go to the before mentioned work fridge, get out salad, and search for dressing. I placed a bottle of dressing there two weeks ago for exactly this occasion. I fumble past soda cans, coffee creamer, year old mustard - no dressing! Who does this? Mess with other peoples stuff in the fridge? Someone who had a HUGE salad and needed my entire bottle? Someone who just thought it looked good and took it home to test? Someone who thought it was old (it wasn't) and tossed it out? Sigh. Anyway, I ate my salad plain - ugh. Not recommended.

Today (Wednesday), I take a salad again (yes, i should have known better) with the dressing already poured on. Definitely not recommended. Soggy lettuce for lunch - again, ugh. I just had to laugh - and its exactly what i did while shoving down the soggy ceasar soaked lettuce leaves. This made yesterdays plain salad seem like a good idea. Note to self - don't take salad for lunch. Take a sandwich, a frozen dinner, anything but salad!! Tomorrow, I think I'll go out for lunch.

Monday, August 27, 2007


"I just don't feel productive, challenged, or useful!" I say to Husband. "At the end of the day, I have learned nothing new! I'm bored. It's such a long day there..." All this in reference to my current job. I'm finally pursuing the dream job via 2 more years of school but currently am required to have A job so - there I am, a Logistician, for the Dept of Defense no less. Sounds fascinating doesn't it? Ehhh, not so much.

"Look things up on the internet," says Husband. "Surf the web! I love to do that at work. What a timepasser huh?" Sigh. "I do! But there is only so much surfing I can do in a 10 hour day, honestly. There just isn't that much I'm dying to look up online - to fill 10 hours that is. Okay, more like 7 hours. I do work for at least 3 hours per day, on average," I tell husband.

I plugged through college courses with visuals of being a incredible career woman, working in some social work aspect, saving the world, the mentally ill, their children, and many other groups of those who needed 'help'. Ahhh what naïve dreams...

Husband wasn't thrilled with the move to Philly. Being a 'Pittsburghian' (is this a word? Doubt it, but it fits him), I wonder if he just felt an obligation to that side of the state? Or perhaps it was the sting operation he witnessed on my interview day? From the vehicle, while waiting on me on Ridge Avenue, he was probably seeking a nap but was abruptly interrupted as undercover policemen surrounded the vehicle and literally pounce on a male passerby. Turns out, he had robbed a bank not that far away and not that long ago. Interview over - I return to vehicle. Feeling elated from a great interview and a job that pays well enough, I return saying, "this could be a real opportunity!" where he then replied "no way in hell are you gonna work here".

So, obviously we moved to Philadelphia and I worked 'There'. Due to that not so great experience on interview day, we did not however move into the city. We became suburbians, commuters, traffic-haters. Let me back up - I said We. ReallyI meant 'I'. I commute into the city. I am a traffic-hater. I have an 1.5 hour commute. We live in the suburbs. Husband works in the suburbs. Lucky Husband!

I worked 4 years 'There' by moving from Interpreter, to Case Manager aka Social Worker/ Counselor, and onto Supervisor. In the end, I do not believe I saved the world, much less one mentally ill person, any children, or other deaf individuals. And what does it exactly mean to 'save' someone? I realized thru my experiences, 'saving'someone just isn't possible. You can provide them only with tools in which to save themselves. The last year there was something I should never have put myself thru. I should have quit from the moment I woke up feeling ill at the thought of going in to work. Why, self, did you not just quit!? Moving on.

Finally the Government opportunity. The job is really not bad at all. ButI don't want to say that - I want to say "I like my job! Wow, what a day! I did so much! The day just flew by!" I'm not even asking to love my job, just like. But again its really not that bad. There are some fabulous perks - great insurance, a 4 day work week, flex hours, guaranteed pay raises, paying for grad school (part of it anyway), a day care onsite (and in another post, for those of you shocked at my mention of a day care, I'll give you more info on this topic that involves the word 'child'), and so many more perks to name yet, I work to remain grateful for them. Husband says "man, I wish my job had that stuff. You're lucky." I know I know. A girl can't help how she feels though, right?

I now know what I really want to do - thank you Lord. I miss math, numbers, calculations. I move forward to 'Goal'. Stick it out till next August. Then will have two years of government service. Almost done with my Masters in Accounting. Maybe a child on the way?? Friends (or others?), please do not send me emails asking if I have fallen ill or if some stranger has taken over my blog at the child comment. No and No to both of these. Until then, I go to work, work, clock watch till lunch break, eat, read, return to desk, repeat. But like I said, its really not that bad.

All of these points come out in dinner conversation. Husband must be tired of this dominating mealtime chatter, I'm sure of it. "Hey, will you watch Jeopardy with me? Really watch it with me too, you know what I mean." Meaning I normally read a magazine while he plays/watches Jeopardy on his own. "Sure" I say while thinking 'that damn show, ugh'. He dashes his dishes to the sink and body into the living room. The things I do for husband.

Sunday, August 26, 2007


I've been reading blogs by authors I love and also my friends. I've been reading blogs of people who I barely know and those that probably don't even know me. I myself, have never blogged. I love to read. I love to journal. But I am by no means, a 'Writer'. So, the idea of blogging all my general day to day activities in a way which makes them sound actually interesting - no way. Blogging all my various opinions, goals, and aspirations for my life and the world in a way that would make sense - impossible. Many blog writings are addicting for me because they are a short story that eventually turns into a novel, and I just can't 'put it down' errr meaning, I can't look away from the cpu screen.

Today in the midst of trying to prepare for yet another week of work, another week of school, another week of life - I was thinking I need a way to get my feelings out. Put my thoughts down. Vent. Express. So, I came home from the hellish grocery shopping and created my very own blog. Yes, I have given in to this century's version of a public journal. When I was little, I wanted a little diary with very small lines on a page, a pink pen to write my innermost thoughts down in that little book and then the key to lock away all my words and keep them very private and close. But these days, it doesn't work that way. I like this version better. I perceive that to be more of who I am. A very open person. Thefore, I'm going to present my life as it is and my opinions as they are. I won't work to make it interesting or ensure it will make sense.